This story begins waaaaay back in December of 2008 (wow, that just made me feel really old) on an atypical night where Bella and I decided to hang out at a club in the butt hole of Seattle - Yes, you guessed it, Pioneer Square. EWWWW. Lots of interesting encounters have taken place in Seattle’s oldest neighborhood, but that's beside the point of this particular story.
My story begins with Bella and I getting ready to go out for a night on the town in our usual glammed up fashion. It was this particular Friday night that we were invited by Bella's Ex, let's just call him Miguel for now (he'll have his own blog entry in the near future), to a friend's birthday shindig. Little did we know, but the party was being held for a girl that went to Bella's high school. Definitely not someone that Bella would consider a friend, maybe an acquaintance at best. This girl had eyes and features that protruded so far she resembled Rodney Dangerfield! Now, I normally wouldn't blatantly make fun of someone for their looks or appearance, but this girl had it coming! Not only was she flirting with Bella's Ex in front of her, she was macking on every guy in the place including the one that I had my eye on. Let's just call him Guatemalan Tool (GT) for now.
The night was going pretty well from the beginning - some light pre-funking before going out and after a couple of cocktails at the club we were feeling a little dancey (it's what we do)! Bella was dancing with Miguel and some of his guy friends and I was looking for an attractive someone to match my own dancing skills. That's when I saw him...tall, dark and handsome, most definitely Hispanic and he could hold his own on the dance floor. We made eye contact and Miguel and Bella were quick to see a gaze of interest between the two of us(they both went to high school with this GT). Needless to say, they introduced us immediately and for the rest of the night I had my dancing partner and was extremely satisfied. As you can very well guess the story does not end here....
Fast forward to NYE 2009 (about three weeks after the club scene), also the next time I saw the Guatemalan Tool. Again, pretty much the same group of people from the club (minus Rodney Dangerfield’s female counterpart) went to a lounge in Ballard to celebrate NYE in style. Nothing too significant happened aside from the fact that Miguel brought his new girl friend with him and this aggravated the hell out of Bella (read the blog on Small Town Tool for more details). After the fête ended, GT and I went back to my apartment near the University District and had a serious convo about his feelings toward me. I wanted a relationship and saw no reason to resist GT, aside from the fact that it would be a semi-long distance relationship because he lived over 2 hours away. He had a car as did I, so there was no reason it wouldn't work as long as we both put forth the effort. Therein lies the problem...
GT and I saw each other about once, sometimes twice a week for the next two months. I was twitter-patted. GT always knew exactly the right things to say and do to keep me wanting more. This tool even went so far as to ask if he could meet my parents! Brazen. Yes, he touted that he was "serious" about the relationship that had been developing between the two of us over the past months. The encounter with my parentals was pretty hilarious in and of itself. My father straight-up told GT that he had a stupid name (yes, that was the first words out of his mouth) and GT took it, but then proceeded to weave my family a string of lies…Hmm where to start...."I own three cars" "I attend the local university" "I have a full-ride soccer scholarship" "I own my own house" "I invited all of my family to live with me" "I gained citizenship here two years ago" "I have a high GPA and am majoring in computer science and work full-time"....and the list goes on and on. GT left the house leaving a good impression with the parental units, however I was suspicious and decided to do a little of my own investigating.
After Googling the classes GT was SUPPOSEDLY taking and the roster for the university soccer team he SUPPOSEDLY played for, I learned real quick that this guy was not being honest about anything at all. No such major at that university and no name on the current or past soccer roosters…this is when things started to go downhill. Oh heck, screw downhill. Shit dropped off a cliff! When I confronted GT about all of his lies, he denied everything! Did he really think a girl working toward a master’s degree wouldn't do her background research and find out sooner or later? Hence the reason he gained blog worthy status!
In an attempt to redeem himself, GT told me that he was going to do something REALLY special for Valentine's Day. He said not to worry about a thing and that everything would be planned out. Now I am not one to really enjoy a guy going over the top on this particular holiday, simply because of the fact that it's so commercialized. But I had to admit that I was getting a little excited to see what GT had in store.
Valentine’s Day 2009 arrived and I was even more excited to see GT and what he had planned for the special day. Five o'clock rolls around and I hadn’t received so much as even a text from GT. I was feeling really down at this point. Was he going to come through and do something to really surprise me, or was he going to be a complete tool and make up yet another lame excuse? I worked up my courage, and sent GT a text to the effect of "ummm....so I thought you were making plans for Valentine's Day?" GT texts right back, "so sorry, my mom has the flu and is in the hospital, I can't do anything today." REALLY!?! After all the lies I had already endured, did he actually think that I would really believe him??? HELL NOOO!
Let's just say over the past two years GT comes around every so often to text or chat, explaining that, "I made the biggest mistake of my life losing you" "you’re the greatest thing that ever happened to me" or "the reason I did what I did was because I was scared and falling in love." Blah Blah Blah. Whatever the case may be, I wasn't having it and bestie Bella assured me that GT was a compulsive liar and not to be trusted.
Moral of the Story: When things sound way too good to be true, that’s usually the case.
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